Cayden....

Cayden....

Monday, September 19, 2011

O my baby boy!

Cayden is still in physical therapy...everyday he goes it gets more and more difficult for him....I keep reminding him that PT is why he gets to walk and play like the other kids...and he says back to me "what if it doesn't work momma?.. I want to be a normal everyday kid..like the ones in my class." ..at 6 years old he does not understand why this is happening to him..and even at my age I don't understand either. He continues to push through the pain everyday..even when I know he is hurting he still doesn't give up...

Emmotionally this has taken a toll  on my baby's confidence..anger issues and just socializing in general.

My heart breaks everyday for him and what he is going through, but I am so helpless and can't take the pain away. He still refuses to take the wheelchair to school due to how he gets treated...he says they (the teachers) don't help him so he would rather hurt and walk. This is so not fair to him....last week a teacher "forgot" about his condition and he had to walk laps with the other children for being loud at lunch...seriously so 45 mins of loud voices.... plus laps around a playground... equals severe pain for him that could last for a week or longer...and all I get is "I forgot" or "I didn't think about it, he should have said something" As a Perthes parent I believe there should be more accomodations at school for him..ex: an aide to help him get around..or just encourage him throughout the day!

My child already felt like he was in trouble so why tell them in fear he would get into more trouble if he stopped walking....they are the adults and they should know...I have a 504 plan and his condition is explained extensively to both of the teachers who made him walk that day.

Awareness is why I started this blog and why I will continue...everyone needs to know why he looks fine on the outside, but in pain on the inside. They need to know what to look for and not just settle for "growing pains"

As I tell Cayden "we continue to do the things we love to do....just in a different way"

Thanks everyone for reading...please pass this on and help spread the awareness!

Friday, September 2, 2011

...Just a little short and sweet update!

Cayden has started Physical Therapy and is extremely sore. October we go back to the ortho to see how much more damage has been done to his hips!...Cayden is at the age now that being different is really starting to effect him...he hates taking his wheelchair anywhere...I try to assure him that things will get better...but he is having a hard time believing me...someday he will understand mommy is always right! Cayden doesn't let this slow him down to much, eventhough, I'm constantly reminding him he will be hurting later and his response is "I know"...while running away ...As things happen I will try harder to update more often...I'm one busy mommy!


Thank you for reading and please pass this on! Awareness is very important!

Saturday, July 2, 2011

Physical Therapy

     8 months into this what some call a "journey" but I call it a nightmare of Legg Calve Perthes....symptoms are getting worse, longer painful nights and less play.... Cayden is starting to ask questions about why he has to hurt all the time and why he has the wheelchair and can't play like all the other kids......Its difficult to explain to my innocent 5 year old why this is happening to him.....when I wonder the same thing...When he has tears of pain...and hurt I try to explain to him why he is so special....I remind him of all the fun things we do still....and how he gets to ride when I have to walk..so far it puts that little grin back his cute little freckled face.                                                             

    Next week he starts.. Physical Therapy and this is going to be the first of what I feel will be many sessions...I am nervous and scared at the same time...I know in the long run he will benefit from it...but I can't help to think of the what if's that come to mind...like what if he is more sore...I can't stand to see him in anymore pain than what he already has to deal with...
    
  As soon as Cayden got old enough to some what understand things...I decided that I would explain everything to him that I possibly could about his medical conditions....so when we found out about the physical therapy I sat him down and tried explained what physical therapy was....I said "Cayden next week you are going to start physical therapy" ....immediately Cayden said " oh no I don't want shots"...I said "they don't give you shots..they are going to help you exercise your hips"...he said " mom I can do that. They don't have to help me do that" I said " well they know how to exercise in special ways" Cayden said "do they get paid?" I said "yes son" He says " well I exercise everyday and don't get paid".....and stomped off to his room... we will try that explanation again later!!!....

Saturday, June 25, 2011

People are Amazing.....

          So tonight a Bowl-A-Thon was coordinated by citizens of this small town that we live in.....it was 5pm to 7pm and half the proceeds go to a Perthes fund that would help Cayden and other children with Perthes as well......I cannot explain how grateful we are that people of this community came and donated,hung out and had an all around good time....NOW we can build his wheelchair ramp that he so desperately needs.
          Cayden bowled and had such a good time...but with the good time came the pain...by 10:00pm he was in so much pain he couldn't stop crying....he still insisted that he had a good time and would do it all over again!....This little boy has more physical strength than most adults ever dreamed of having.....and through the pain and agony he still finds that strength to push on....HE is my hero....
            AS a mother I wish I could take all his pain and suffering away....I wish he could run and play like most kids his age...or go to sleep and stay asleep pain free....I pray every night that the lord will give him relief....they say there is power in prayer...and prayer is all we have left!

Friday, June 17, 2011

UPDATE: June 14,2011.......

     Sorry it has been awhile Cayden is pretty much keeping me busy!......So to update everyone....Cayden went for a about three weeks with very little pain...He was actually playing like a 5 year old should....and then we were broad sided by extreme pain that kept him confined to the wheelchair for the better part of 3 days....we were up at all hours of the night....pain medicine every 4 hours and bathes at hours of the night I didn't know exsisted.....he would use an electric blanket to soothe the pain with the heat...it was a very long 3 days....It took alot out of all of us...
     June 14,2011- As I pushed him in his wheelchair down the long hall at OU Childrens University to the Orthopedic department all I could do was pray......Cayden had a good summer so far, but I knew those three days of pain were different than usual....we signed in and waited to be called back.....Finally what seemed forever the nurse came to the waiting room and called Cayden's name...the whole time I sat there I prayed we would receive good news...First thing we did was x-rays...then it was time for truths...the first thing the doctor said when he came into the room was does Cayden complain one or both hips hurt?...My stomach dropped..I knew exactly what that meant....Cayden said both my legs hurt and they are really tired all the time...the doctor checked his range of motion which is very impressive...and then pulled up the x-rays.....he went over the left one which continues to break down normally and then he pulled up the right hip x-ray....and there we seenimmediately what we were terrified of...Cayden now has Perthes in the right hip as well.
  When both hips are affected it is called bilateral perthes...which only occur in about 10-20% of all cases and normally diagnoses come months apart.....
   Cayden is a fighter and we will get through this together.....Perthes is LIFE altering not LIFE threatening! We will make it!

Monday, May 2, 2011

Consideration.......

For those of that are new to this blog here is a recap.....Cayden is my 5 year old little fighter...Dec 2010 he was diagnosed with a rare hip condition called Perthes, this is just another obstacle that he is fighting to overcome. Up to this point we feel like we are running in circles trying to bite the tail that isn't there!

                  Today Cayden is having just a little bit of a problem walking.....he refused his wheelchair this morning,because he says the other kids stare at him...and that is where I wanted to start today.....when Cayden was old enough to start asking questions about those with disabilities we would sit down and explain it to him.....it was really hard sometimes knowing what to say, but we did the best we could.
                 When Cayden takes his chair out in public or even when he limps people stare....not only kids,but adults too! I was shocked by the amount of adults that would act as if they to were a child...and point...not to mention those that would not move out or the way or assist going through doorways ect...but just stare. It is very hurtful.....all he wants is to be "normal" as he says. 

                Cayden is so self conscious that he doesn't want to be the center of attention.....he has hard days when the wheelchair is a must and good days where he forgets he has it......so what I am getting at is if you are a parent put yourself in my shoes......what if that were your child people are staring at or won't move to get through. Explain to your children what it means to be in a wheelchair or why they shouldn't stare...........

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Emmotional day.....

                 Yesterday started out an awesome day except for the part that Cayden was in some pain....We loaded up his wheelchair and off to school he went...at school he overcame many the obstacles in his way..such as pulling his chair up to the table to color. Lunch was a little more difficult...wore most of  his lunch than ate it.
                  Recess is when the day took a turn....he couldn't run or play...no more running from the girls...couldn't get out and play basketball or climb on the playground equipment. Several times he got stuck in the grass and had to get help getting out. When he returned to the classroom his teacher said he was teary eyed.
                 After school when I picked him up his arms were tired....his hip was still hurting and he felt he missed out on everything.....Cayden was mostly quiet the way home from school...he limped inside while I unloaded his chair...when I came in he was crying and upset...I said Bubba whats wrong? He said momma I can't do the stuff I want to do when I'm in that chair...and I can't do them when my leg hurts either..he said all the kids were staring at me and it was hard to even go to the bathroom.....I was at a loss for words...what do I say to him?...My heart was broken into a million little pieces....as I fought back the tears I finally said what would help you?...he said for me to be my little normal boy....I tried to explain to him the best I could that he isn't a normal little boy nor was he ever. I reminded him how we dealt with his kidneys and the extra things we had to do...like frequent the restroom..or be careful what he drank...he remembered and then I reminded him what we have to do when his asthma acts up....he has to have his nebulizer and sit down for a few...and then I went on to tell him that when his hip is hurting and he needs his chair we will figure out some other stuff for him to do instead of sitting on the playground watching the other kids play.....I try to remind myself as well as Cayden (in different words for him) that this is life altering, not life threatening.....but to Cayden it is his life...he thinks basically his life has ended....he is starting to give up on things that he can still do.....I think this is going to be a hard rough summer.....in the end of our conversation I hope Cayden seen that not everyone is the same and there really isn't any such thing as normal....I continue to pray every night to the lord to help us better understand this and how to deal with it......