Yesterday started out an awesome day except for the part that Cayden was in some pain....We loaded up his wheelchair and off to school he went...at school he overcame many the obstacles in his way..such as pulling his chair up to the table to color. Lunch was a little more difficult...wore most of his lunch than ate it.
Recess is when the day took a turn....he couldn't run or play...no more running from the girls...couldn't get out and play basketball or climb on the playground equipment. Several times he got stuck in the grass and had to get help getting out. When he returned to the classroom his teacher said he was teary eyed.
After school when I picked him up his arms were tired....his hip was still hurting and he felt he missed out on everything.....Cayden was mostly quiet the way home from school...he limped inside while I unloaded his chair...when I came in he was crying and upset...I said Bubba whats wrong? He said momma I can't do the stuff I want to do when I'm in that chair...and I can't do them when my leg hurts either..he said all the kids were staring at me and it was hard to even go to the bathroom.....I was at a loss for words...what do I say to him?...My heart was broken into a million little pieces....as I fought back the tears I finally said what would help you?...he said for me to be my little normal boy....I tried to explain to him the best I could that he isn't a normal little boy nor was he ever. I reminded him how we dealt with his kidneys and the extra things we had to do...like frequent the restroom..or be careful what he drank...he remembered and then I reminded him what we have to do when his asthma acts up....he has to have his nebulizer and sit down for a few...and then I went on to tell him that when his hip is hurting and he needs his chair we will figure out some other stuff for him to do instead of sitting on the playground watching the other kids play.....I try to remind myself as well as Cayden (in different words for him) that this is life altering, not life threatening.....but to Cayden it is his life...he thinks basically his life has ended....he is starting to give up on things that he can still do.....I think this is going to be a hard rough summer.....in the end of our conversation I hope Cayden seen that not everyone is the same and there really isn't any such thing as normal....I continue to pray every night to the lord to help us better understand this and how to deal with it......
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